Hi Coach,

You might be doing things every day that make you look less like an expert. Even though you're doing them with the best of intentions.

If you're a coach, consultant, or anyone in a client-facing role — this matters. Because your clients want to be led. They want to feel confident in your guidance. But here’s the problem: authority can be lost in tiny moments.

A word here. A phrase there. And all of a sudden, you’re not showing up as the expert anymore — you’re back in the beta seat.

That’s what this episode is about. It’s about the small things — the language, tone, and habits — that accidentally diminish your authority. And what to do instead.

You can watch the video or listen to the episode, but this article will give you the full value — no fluff, no filler. Just the lesson.

• 🎥 Watch episode 14 of Say What You See on YouTube​
• 🎧 Listen to episode 14 of Say What You See on Spotify​

Why this matters more than you think

Authority isn’t about ego. It’s about trust, respect, and being the person your client listens to and follows.

When you show up with authority:

• Your guidance is taken seriously
• Projects move faster
• Clients take more ownership
• You’re not stuck doing their job and yours

But most people I work with don’t realise how often they’re unconsciously slipping into people-pleasing behaviours — in their language.

The way you open a session. The words you use to respond. The way you close a meeting.

It’s subtle.

But it has a big impact on how you're perceived.

The tiny language traps that weaken your authority

Let’s walk through the three big ones — the ones you’re probably doing without noticing.

1. “Sorry I’m late”

Harmless? Polite? Maybe. But at the start of a session, “sorry” can undermine your presence straight away.

What I’ve learned through testing is this:

Try this instead:

• “Thanks for your patience — let’s get started”
• “Now that we’re all here, let’s get going”

You don’t need to fall on your sword to acknowledge lateness. Say less. Move into the work. Stay in the seat of authority.

2. “Thank you for your time”

Sounds respectful, right? But it puts your time below theirs. It implies that their time is more valuable than yours — which flips the power dynamic.

I stopped saying it. And guess what?

Instead, try:

• “Great session today”
• “Really valuable use of time”
• “Loved the energy in that call”

As the coach, consultant, or expert — you should be the one recognising quality. Not just handing out thanks like sweets.

3. “How are you?”

We’ve all done this at the start of a session. It’s friendly. It’s polite. But it’s also… empty.

You open with that, and suddenly the energy drops. Small talk. Loops. A slow start.

Here’s what I do:

• “Great to see you — let’s get started”
• Or better: “Since we last spoke, what’s felt like real progress for you?”

It’s not about being cold or transactional. It’s about being purposeful. Setting the tone. Leading the space.

What you say shapes how they see you

Here’s the truth:

Your authority doesn’t live in your credentials or experience alone. It lives in the micro-moments — the language you use, the pace you set, and the presence you bring.

This stuff isn’t about being robotic. It’s about being intentional.

Swap one phrase, and the tone shifts. Swap two or three, and you’ve created a whole new energy. One that says: I’m here to lead, not to people-please.

Authority is built in how you start, how you respond, and how you carry yourself.

Over to you

Here’s your challenge this week — take one or all:

1. Pick one swap and train it in.

• Start your next session without “how are you?”
• Replace “thanks for your time” with something stronger
• See what changes

2. Watch the first 3 minutes of your next recorded session.

Ask: What’s the energy like? Where am I softening my authority?

3. Get the Authority Language Bingo Card

It’s a free resource I’ve created to help you spot and eliminate the language that’s weakening your impact.

👉 https://pages.theauthoritativecoach.com/weakwordsvideo​

Bonus: Let’s talk...

Hit reply and tell me:

What’s one phrase or habit you’ve noticed yourself using that might be costing you authority?

You don’t need to overhaul your whole style.

Just start with one small shift — one word swap — and build from there.

🗣️ 👀

Chris.